Learning Patience

Only a true gamer will understand the pain.

“Welcome, traveler. Long have the gods looked favorably on our small town of Beginning Area.”

“Why are you telling me this?” asked Hero. “Does this have any relevance to the quest?”

“No. This is just scene-setting, or ambience, if you will. It’s to give the world a deeper and richer atmosphere to immerse yourself into the experience,” explained NPC. “This isn’t just some silly game. This is art! Thousands of skilled and sophisticated artists lovingly crafted my words to be just right.”

“Boring! Do not want! Skip! Skip! Skip! A Button! A Button! A Button!”

“But then—And—All the—Then—We have—Do you want to hear this again? Yes- Press A. No- Press B. Long have the gods looked favorably—”

Hero sighed audibly. “Why did ‘advance text’ and ‘yes’ have to be the same button? Skip—skip—skip—skip.”

“Bu—A—Al—Th—W—Do—Yes- Press A. No- Press B. Long have the gods looked favorably—”

“Okay, this time I’ll slow down just a little so I won’t have to go through this all again.”

“But then the monster turnips—And elephants from space—All the party balloons were—Then the doctor said I had two—We have plenty of bubble gum so—”

“What is this game?” Hero said to himself, momentarily distracted.

“Do you want to hear this again? Yes- Press A. No- Press B. Long have the gods looked favorably—”

“Noooooooo!” cried Hero.