De- End to Dis-
It can all begin with changing the words you use.
Arthur Smalley stood on the bustling city sidewalk, his pressed shirt crisp and hair neatly combed, when Clara Fellows, an old acquaintance, spotted him they crossed paths downtown. Her eyes widened. “Arthur! Is that you? You look so different from the last time I saw you,” she said, her voice warm with surprise. “What’s changed? You’re glowing.”
Arthur smiled, standing taller, his former slouch gone. “Thanks, Clara. I was in a dark place for years, but I figured out why. The words I used kept me there, trapped in negativity. I don’t think that way anymore. I’m rebuilding my life with new words—words that have been there the whole time without realizing it.”
Clara leaned in, intrigued. “New words? Like what?”
His grin widened, eyes alight with purpose. “I get up every morning and start the day with combobulated thoughts.”
“Combobulated?” Clara said.
“The opposite of discombobulated,” Arthur explained. “I figured if I was discombobulated all the time, the secret was to reverse it was to combobulate. And bam! I found mental clarity, and now I solve problems without my brain spinning.”
“I like that,” Clara said, nodding. “It sounds calming. What else?”
Arthur said, gesturing to his tidy appearance. “Notice that I’m sheveled, not disheveled. Once I had the word, I knew what to strive for: Hair combed, shirt ironed, grooming with intent and purpose.”
Clara chuckled, eyeing his polished shoes. “You are sheveled today. Impressive. Keep going.”
“Everyone, myself included, are always disgruntled, muttering complaints. I asked myself, ‘What if I was gruntled instead?’ Let me tell you, it’s a game-changer. Nothing gets me down now that I’ve decided to be gruntled with life.”
“You sound so optimistic,” Clara said, smiling. “That’s new for you.”
“Exactly,” Arthur replied, his tone bright. “I’m jected. I feel a surge of hope, like I’m ready to take on the world.”
“Instead of ‘dejected,’ right?” Clara said.
“Right. Only feelings of jection for me now.”
Clara nodded, impressed. “You’re radiating. Any more?”
“Plenty,” Arthur said, his enthusiasm bubbling. “I mantled my desk at work, even got a plant. Then this afternoon I was fuddled with a tax code question—I was able to ambiguate it right away.”
“This is wild,” Clara said, her smile wide. “You’re a completely different man!”
“Maybe,” Arthur said, eyes gleaming. “I was in a very dark place in my life. But then I spaired, and I realized I was corrigible.”
Clara’s expression softened. “I love it. You’re inspiring me, Arthur. Keep coining those words. Can we catch up over some coffee? I’d love to hear more.”
“Sure,” Arthur said, nodding. “How about the coffee shop at the end of the block? Their lattes are gusting!”
Clara paused a moment, processing the word, and then laughed. “Sounds absolutely asperating.”
Arthur lifted his eyebrows in surprise. “I like it.”